For centuries, we have been locked into the gender roles of man as provider and protector and woman as homemaker and caregiver. But the 21st century has seen the beginning of role changes within the family. Men are choosing to stay home and become home husbands. The West, especially Canada, the United Kingdom, and the United States, have embraced this new concept of stay-at-home husbands. Asian and Indian families are still a long way from doing it. Muslims believe that it is not Islamic for a man to assume the role of a woman.
Reasons for the change:
• As middle age approaches, many men feel trapped in stressful corporate jobs. They long for less demanding occupations and believe that housework and childcare is easier and will leave time for recreation and hobbies.
• There has been an unprecedented increase in women in the workforce. Higher education and career skills have broken the glass ceiling so that women can take on jobs that were once the prerogatives of men. In many cases, they can earn higher wages than their husbands. Sometimes women are the only ones who earn their bread. Feminist ideologies, the availability of contraceptives, and the influence of the media have also contributed to the rise of working women.
• Unemployment and loss of administrative jobs for men.
• The wonders of telecommunications allow men to work from home and thus secure a regular pay package. Hours and work patterns are flexible.
Advantages of being a full-time parent:
1. This eliminates the need for home help, which is becoming costly and unreliable. There are many cases of maids who starve, sedate, or mistreat children. Some time ago, an Indian newspaper reported that a working woman came home in the middle of the day to find that her son was missing and that the maid was happily watching television and chewing on peanuts. When questioned, the maid said that she had sedated the baby and given it to a beggar woman, with a rent of Rs 100 per day.
Thefts of food items, money or jewelry have also been reported from time to time.
2. It is not necessary to leave children in child care centers during the day.
3. Parental involvement in the parenting process is said to enhance children’s physical, emotional, and behavioral development. They become more emotionally balanced and develop better coping skills. They grow up to be confident and self-confident.
4. Mothers can continue their careers without feeling guilty that their children are not well cared for. Because they are stress free, they can do their best at work. When work is done, they are relaxed enough to spend quality time with family and make up for their absence during the day.
5. Husbands become experts in kitchen management and discover their latent culinary talents.
6. Men are likely to spend frugally and budget efficiently. Women are sometimes prone to overspending on things they don’t need or hoarding more than is necessary.
7. Housework is not discrediting manhood. Men can still provide leadership in the family.
Probable downsides:
– Women may be forced to work outside the home against their wishes. This shouldn’t be an opportunity for lazy husbands to sit home and do nothing.
– Men have fragile egos. Your value is linked to your ability to meet the financial needs of the family and to be in a position of authority. Vicky Larson says: “If their identity is threatened, they can overcompensate with alcohol, drugs, risky behavior, anger, or become sexually aggressive. Breeding status is an important component of masculinity. Economic dependency threatens masculinity. “.
– The feeling of isolation, loneliness or boredom can generate romantic links on the Internet. Porn addiction cannot be ruled out. Christian Munsch, a postdoctoral researcher, concluded that the more dependent a man is on his wife, the more likely he is to cheat on her.
– Incestuous behavior with children is a possibility. “An idle mind is the devil’s workshop.”
How to be a happy and successful housewife:
The decision must be your own. It must be planned and well thought out. The pros and cons must be considered. There must be understanding and agreement between husband and wife regarding childcare and household responsibilities. The couple should be able to resist criticism from family and society.
James Williams says, “Home responsibilities are not degrading or undesirable, but opportunities for loving service.”
Housework is not easy. They can be difficult and exhausting. Sometimes boring. But it will make men realize that women have been sticking with this exercise for years, without complaining or receiving any consideration from their husbands. It could bring a greater appreciation of the role of housewives.
However, the rewards of stay-at-home dads outweigh the cons. Participating in your children’s lives, watching them grow, being available and accessible, gives them a great sense of satisfaction and achievement. Full-time dads need to show their love and affection for their children as mothers do. They must learn to verbalize their feelings. A hug or a kiss will speak volumes. At the same time, there should be no undue indulgence.
Men tend to be rigid and authoritarian. This would be counterproductive. Boundaries must be defined and communicated with love. This gives children a sense of stability and security.
Pushing a young child in a stroller or shopping for groceries or attending PTA meetings alone can lead to sarcastic comments. A confident parent will know how to deal with such situations.
When fathers replace mothers, it is imperative that they take a personal interest in their children’s lives, their school activities, their friends, their interests and hobbies. They must also learn to recognize anger, pain, or frustrations in order to provide emotional support. The emotional ties grow stronger and parenting becomes a joy.
Parents do not need to isolate themselves from friends and become slaves of the home. Whenever the opportunity presents itself, they can meet up with friends or socialize, or even invite them over for a cup of tea.
Being a full-time parent is by no means an easy ride. You need patience, love, firmness and perseverance.
As Oscar Wilde said, “Contentment … only comes to the one who works and wins; to the one who performs the task at hand and reaps the satisfaction of a job well done.”
