The first impression is everything! I know, many of us have heard the phrase a thousand times, right? But it is true, that when we meet someone for the first time, that time may not be the last time we meet them, in fact, there is a universal law “what goes up, comes down” or “what goes around, comes around” . around.” That person we may have said a nasty word to or rubbed the wrong way could end up being someone who can decide my fate in court, give me a yes or no answer for a loan, decide or not to sell me their house. Whatever the case, building rapport can or should drive, close, or seal the deal in your favor!
What should we do or say when we first meet a seller?
- Is this the right person? Introduce yourself politely, shake the owner’s hand and ask “Are you Mr./Mrs. so-and-so, great, nice to finally meet you.”
- Speak slowly, mimicking the pitch level and speed of speech with the salesperson. Don’t talk too much to the seller, don’t talk too much to the seller, or talk faster than the seller. Speak at the same pace and tone level. Use body language by leaning in to show that you are interested in what he/she is saying. Stand as they stand, sit as they sit, and be subtle. The idea here is not to overtly imitate. That would seem weird or strange. Also, interact the way they like to interact, and interact like them, and you’ll develop a better connection and rapport.
- Meet the seller. Look around the house and pay attention to family photos or photographs. make conversation; get the seller to talk about himself, like clothes-marriage-children, etc. Ask questions and don’t talk about yourself too much. Build a relationship while asking questions about the house. Once again, get the seller to talk about himself.
“Harvard neuroscientists Diana Tamir and Jason Mitchell have conducted a series of behavioral experiments, pointing to the fact that talking about oneself (in this case, it would be the salesperson) feels so rewarding, right down to the brain cells and the synapse, that people can’t help but share details about themselves.
If you master the four relationship principles, you can/will walk away with the DEAL!
- Statement of Principle #1: Empathy: Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others. If you want to understand another person, a) get them to talk about themselves and b) show that they are listening.
- Report on principle #2: Authenticity: “Be real, be yourself.” No fake or fake smiles. Have a genuine concern about the seller’s situation and talk about family, hobbies and why he is selling. People like genuine people.
- Relationship Principle #3: Similarity – The more you can find common ground, the more likely you are to develop a genuine relationship and like each other. They prefer people to move as they move. Find a common background with the other person and you will be able to make and deepen connections.
- Reporting Principle #4: Shared Experience – It’s also true that if you just hang out with people (dinner, coffee, events, etc.), your affinity for each other will increase. So if you want to build a relationship and increase your influence with sellers or buyers, engage with them. Create a shared experience.
We are here to build relationships with Sellers and Buyers and to do this we have invested our time to ensure that we are adhering to the 4 Relationship Principles:
- Empathy: Be curious. Listen. Watch out.
- Authenticity: Being real.
- Similarity: find common ground.
- Shared experience: Interact.
