When Prince Charming arrives and you marry him, the last thing you want to think about is that he might drop dead or, worse yet, turn into an ogre. However, millions of women have had one or both experiences. Deana Carter Ingalls is here to help when your fairy tale turns into a nightmare. In her new book What to Do If You Boot Him or Bury Him, she offers practical, realistic, sensible financial advice on what to do now so you won’t be caught off guard if your husband dies or you end up divorcing.
Charter Life Underwriter (CLU), Charter Financial Consultant (ChFC) and Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA), Deana starts by sharing a few facts in case you think being divorced or widowed is something you don’t need to worry about. about about According to the 2010 US Census, the United States has the 10th highest divorce rate in the world: 53%. That equates to a divorce every six seconds. Also, because many married women are unprepared for divorce or the death of their spouse, they don’t have the assets and financial savvy to stay ahead of the game. The National Retirement Security Institute reports that 80% of women are likely to fall into poverty in their retirement years.
Deana understands what a woman is likely to face, and she says it bluntly: “If the husband you supported emotionally, sexually, and maybe even financially while getting a professional degree doesn’t leave you for the yoga instructor who was in diapers when you were being attending your high school prom, I will most likely die before you.” In fact, 80% of women outlive their husbands, and almost half of them say they wish they had taken a more active role in finances before they died.
If you fear missing out on handling finances when your spouse is no longer around, What to Do If You Get Kicked or Buried is the perfect book to educate yourself now. Perhaps best of all, it’s a quick read that tells you all the basics you need to know. At just 100 pages, this book can be read in just a couple of hours, and then you can refer back to it regularly as needed. It’s small enough to fit in your bag so you can take it to read in the waiting room, on the bus, or when you have a spare minute.
In addition to a Foreword by Patrick Snow, the international bestselling author Creating Your Own Destiny, the book is divided into fifteen short chapters that explain everything you need to know. Every conceivable topic is covered, from Social Security and Medicare to investment options, finding a trusted financial advisor, child support and alimony, determining your tolerance for financial risk, health care , long-term care insurance, life insurance, and even how to get back on your feet. in the dating game again, if you feel the need.
Deanna goes into detail about topics you may be wondering about or haven’t even considered, like what you need to know about Social Security, depending on the age at which you take it, and also how to collect it from your spouse. She shares that if she helped her spouse through college, she might be eligible for a tuition refund. And she helps you go on a scavenger hunt to learn about your spouse’s finances before the big event happens, be it divorce or death. This scavenger hunt is vital because if your spouse is in debt, you’ll be responsible for half of it, so it’s better to find out sooner rather than later.
Although she deals with serious topics, Deana’s tone is often humorous, as the title of the book makes clear. Each chapter begins with a humorous or insightful quote. My personal favorite is from Roseanne Barr, who said, “I’m not upset about my divorce. I’m just upset because I’m not a widow.” Each chapter is packed with fun graphics to highlight sidebar information and various important-to-know facts.
Finally, Deana reminds us of the importance of keeping our emotions out of our financial plans. While it’s normal to have anger or resentment after divorce, or fear and grief after death, we can’t let it interfere with our financial decisions. The same is true if we re-enter the dating scene; women don’t want to let their emotions put them in situations where the men they date end up fleecing them.
If you’re contemplating divorce or just being realistic about the fact that your spouse will likely precede you, then What To Do If You Kick It Or Bury It will be your new best friend that, until now, you may never have realized you needed. So don’t delay; it is always better to be prepared.
