Are you afraid that now that the funeral is over and everyone has returned to their usual roles, your loved one will be slowly forgotten? Or are you wondering what you could do to make it clear that the deceased is still a part of your family and will be forever?
There are many things you can do to honor the deceased while keeping their memory alive. In many cases, the way you remember the person will be a source of wisdom and humor that can last for years and be an inspiration in life.
Here are ten ways to start showing love even if you are separated from your loved one.
1. When the time is right (and only you will know when) tell your favorite story about your loved one. It could be a funny story or one that illustrates your character. Pick the right place and people to share your best with and be alert to inject it as a normal, natural extension of the conversation.
2. Periodically use a favorite recipe that your loved one liked to eat or cook. You can also serve your favorite dessert with a reminder of what the conversation was like when it was served.
3. Plant a keepsake garden or a tree, shrub, or flowers that bloom each year called “Sarah’s Garden,” “Mary’s Tree,” or Joe’s Plant. “Choose items that were your favorites. loved one.If possible, place them in a space so that when you look out the window they can be seen and you can comment on their growth or appearance during the year.
4. Use your loved one’s first name every day. You can do this by choosing to speak to him / her every day, either silently or out loud, or you can tell others that you hope they feel free to use the name and talk about the loved one when it is natural to refer to them. . in a particular conversation.
5. On holidays, birthdays, summer cookouts, or anniversaries, find a way to symbolically acknowledge the presence of your loved one. Use a particular utensil when cooking; display a special item that belonged to the deceased; light a candle at home and / or in church; show something the person did or painted; make a toast in which the person is mentioned by name or hang a particular ornament or object that characterizes the loved one.
6. Do something to continue the charitable interest your loved one had in a particular organization or cause. It could be things like preserving some part of the environment, sponsoring a child in an orphanage, helping the homeless, or volunteering at a soup kitchen. You may also consider establishing a scholarship at a high school or college.
7. Put on your loved one’s favorite song or a song from your favorite artist or television show. It can also be helpful to find music that has been popular earlier in your life and can bring back old memories of you and your loved one.
8. On an anniversary or other special day, ask your best friend to take a trip to a favorite place you used to go with your loved one. While there the past and the memories evoked by this visit are discussed. When you are further away from reinvesting in life, you may want to take this journey yourself and choose to talk to your deceased loved one about the good times you had there.
9. Make a collage of photos of your loved one that you can frame and post in your home or office. If you have a specific artistic talent (or could hire someone), draw cartoons or symbols that illustrate the person’s interests, character, or abilities and include them in the collage. Include a sample of the deceased’s work, if applicable.
10. Make a name plate of your loved one engraved with a favorite saying (yours or the one your loved one liked). Ask your local college or university, if it was associated with it, if they would accept a donation from a campus bank with your loved one’s name on it. Or buy a bench and place it in your garden area or in a cemetery garden.
In short, the way you remember your loved one is only limited by your creativity. So, consider what you learned from your loved one, how you helped others, and how you feel you would like to be remembered. Ask other people you trust for their opinion. Then decide how you will keep the memory of your loved one alive through the tangible reminders you create.