On the first day of my first retreat in 1999, my spiritual guide (Achariya AnandaGiri ji) told us, “Enlightenment is awareness. It is different for everyone.” With that written down, I’ll tell you what my personal experience has been over the last eight years.
I first experienced what I believe to be consciousness when I received an energy transfer from my teacher (Sri Anandagiri ji). I was experiencing what I now know to be the witnessing state. It seemed extremely short. Similar experiences arose in bursts over the next two years as he practiced numerous meditations, yoga, and especially when he led spiritual workshops.
During the workshops I experience a presence of the divine (universal consciousness) as if consciousness itself was running the seminar and not me. As time passed, this presence grew stronger and stronger. So strong that it manifests itself as a voice. This was not surprising as before any workshop we were trained to ask the divine to come and give the participants what they each need individually.
During my second retreat in 2000, one of the Oneness University guides told me “things will be very different now.” I can still see his glowing face from hers quite clearly. (This monk is now a cosmic being who gives Darshan to thousands every year.) He was right. During this retreat, while practicing walking meditation and touching the foliage, I experienced that everything in the universe is energy. I was eating a cookie and that cookie was energy, the leaves were energy, living and non-living objects were all the same. I experienced that everything was in slow motion and that I was an embodiment of energy. That year, under a banyan tree, I asked my teacher the burning question that crosses the minds of all seekers: “Why do we feel so separate?” and he replied: “because you think you are!”. It was then that I came face to face with man’s greatest enemy and tool: THE MIND.
This same year after receiving an energy transfer I experienced an awareness that lasted for months. I was experiencing outbreaks of testimony and unity with the universe. A few days later I met a prominent guide at the university (Sri Samadarshini ji), who initiated me under a new name: Aditi. She looked me in the eye and asked, “How does she feel?” Her smile was bright and all knowing. I returned her smile without being able to speak or move at that moment, but in complete happiness.
After the retreat ended, those who stayed for the training received an additional cleanse. It was during this time that one of the guides instructed me in a process to silence the mind. He wanted to tell her that such a thing wouldn’t work for me. She wanted to ask how she could be so sure it would happen. To my surprise I was never the same again. Thereafter I experienced an altered state of consciousness. It was marked by a silence that could not be disturbed. It was actually permanent! Over the next several years, I returned to Oneness University for training on how to effectively run various workshops and retreats.
In February 2004 I attended a retreat again. Unity energy transfers were taking place again at this time. Two days before the energy transfer I felt intense pressure in my head as if my brain was disturbed. I felt like someone had their hands on my head reorganizing my brain. This feeling was accompanied by a lack of all emotions. This went on for about an hour. Then I experienced joy and immense energy. I extended my hand to my friend and transferred some of this state to him just by touching it. We ran around campus singing, laughing, giggling, and playing. The next two days I experienced physical trauma and wounds that were left on my body. Finally, the day of the energy transfer (Deeksha) had arrived and I was the last to enter the room. There was no room to sit except for a small crack in the front row. I dragged myself to the spot and sat down. Then I realized that our guide was about to transfer energy to us and he walked directly towards me: I was the first in line to receive energy. It was as if someone had turned off all the lights. Except the change was because of suffering. I was experiencing peace and silence. A few hours later I was on the plane back home.
At home I experienced strong pressure, various sensations, pains and tingling in my head every day. It seemed that some days the divine had put a hat on my head to filter out all the noise. I was in a complete state of silence and peace. A dropped pin would have sent strong shock waves through my body. Other times I was not affected by any noise, movement, word or action. The states ranged from complete silence, stillness, laughter, anger, and jealousy to immense energy. Each experience was an end in itself. I was experiencing a state of consciousness in which all emotions were fully experienced. The energy transfer had surfaced everything that was deep inside.
One day I was experiencing unity and suddenly I got angry. He was filled only with anger, but this time he was fully aware of it. I realized that anger, jealousy, insecurity, fear was in me and had nothing to do with anyone but myself. I was angry for half an hour to forty-five minutes. After fully experiencing the anger, I did not feel any residue from the event. Then I experience that the anger did not belong to me. I saw that as long as I live on this planet in this body, I will experience negative emotions. I felt empty and nonexistent. At that time there was only energy. The energy was pouring out of my head extremely fast. I then felt my head glow with an aura of golden light. It was so strong that my head was being pushed back. A mystic was present during this experience and witnessed my head glowing with white light. I couldn’t speak, move or hold my head up.
Despite everything that has happened, I know there is always more! On a fifth trip to India, I received the gift of transferring the Oneness Blessing (formerly known as deeksha) to anyone who came to my doorstep. I humbly accepted this gift and continue to share it. It is my hope and prayer that others will travel to this place known as Oneness University and receive this gift as well.
I am very grateful to my spiritual guide Sri Ananda Giri Ji for all the gifts and time he spent guiding me for so many years. For this reason we have opened “Our House of Light” and invited all seekers to come and receive the Blessing of Unity.
-aditi ji
